Category Archives: Happiness

Attitude Realignment Needed

The signs in the tire store window shout “Brakes, Shocks, and Wheel Alignment.”  That describes my week, I think to myself as I take the picture.  I’d been trying to realign my attitude for several days.  

After I was unsuccessful uploading photos from the Web into my blog on Tuesday, I realized I can start my photo library. That insight starts my attitude alignment.

On Thursday, I wear a watch that’s still on Daylight Savings Time, but don’t notice this until I’m downtown to meet a friend for lunch.  This gives me an entire hour to walk around Pasadena and begin my photographic adventure. I walk along a tree-lined street, looking for blog photos.  One jumps in front of me after just a few steps: “Wrong Way, Do Not Enter.”  I take a picture of the sign and keep going.  Then I hear the tire store window calling, “Brakes, Shocks, Wheel Alignment.”  In the process of taking pictures, my attitude starts getting realigned

After the tire store I see a new, forest green wrought iron bench shaded by huge trees.  Who could ask for a more peaceful image?  As I frame the picture, I notice that the red curb needs paint and there’s a fluid stain under the bench.  I hope the stain is from someone’s coffee, but who knows?  Some days are like a beautiful bench with a urine stain under it.  Other days, it’s just coffee.  Click, goes the camera again.

I begin to see humor in the day.  I take pictures of potted plants, a stone eagle perched regally on top of a wall, bizarre birds of paradise in bloom.  As I wait for my friend, I brainstorm other pictures and my mood lightens so much that when he forgets our lunch, I have a margarita and lobster/spinach/eggplant quesadilla on my own. 

As I return home my attitude creaks into even better alignment.  Since the backyard is fragrant with roses, I take close-ups of their blooms.  I photograph our lime tree that’s so laden with fruit a friend propped up its branches with thick poles this week.  I’ve watched that tree grow slowly for 12 years and never seen such abundance on it.  Thank you, God, for the bounty that comes after steady care. Click.

Then I turn to a Christmas cactus on the patio and takes its picture.  It was so dry and shriveled just five months ago that it looked like wasted use of a good pot.  Just before I threw it away, a wiser gardener than I told me it just needed a different kind of light to thrive again.  Now the old stems are firm, vivid green with fuchsia colored blossoms in time for Thanksgiving.  God brought life where it seemed hard to find.  Maybe the same is happening for me. 

Looking through the photos I’ve taken along the street and in my backyard, I’m grateful.  As I pause over the photo of the Christmas cactus blooming, I hear the words of a hymn echo in my mind:  “Were the whole realm of nature mine, That were a present far too small; Love so amazing, so divine, Demands my soul, my life, my all” (When I Survey the Wondrous Cross, Isaac Watts).

Note to readers:  I exhausted myself in my exuberance and still need to download camera software.  Therefore, my Friday post is being published on Saturday, and without photos. Stay tuned. Remember, it took time for the limes to ripen and the flowers to bloom.  So, too, for my blog to develop.

Acting our way into Being

Becoming requires action.  And yes, this is a blog about life, not a philosophy blog.  We don’t think our way into new actions, behaviors, or attitudes.  We act our way into them.

Paralysis is easy.  Over-thinking, -managing, and -analyzing are easy.  Although inertia, fear, depression, anxiety, and unhappiness are uncomfortable, staying in them can feel easier than taking action to move forward.  What I learned in grade school science–that it requires less energy to keep an object in motion than it does to get it moving in the first place–is true in life, as well.  What do you want change in your life? Don’t just think, do, and you will change.

photo by sean dreilinger

Acting our way into being can feel scary, exciting, uncomfortable, irritating, joyful, sad, methodical, or haphazard; and sometimes we feel several of these emotions at the same time.   However, when we act, we discover strength, insight, or abilities beyond what we thought we had.  Like a child who takes a first step and doesn’t realize exactly what happened, but feels excited and tries it again, our experience gives us incentive to take another step, to keep acting upon our life and world.  Action becomes easier, much like a ball that keeps rolling after being nudged.  We might pause or run out of steam for a while.  We might fall like a child learning to walk.  But like a child learning to walk and explore a larger world, our experience of action shows us that we’re different now than we were.  Acting encourages more action.  It’s like what happened with someone this week who told me, “I didn’t think I liked to meet new people and I didn’t think I was good at it, but I pushed myself to do that at work this week.  I discovered I liked it after all.  I’m also a lot better at it that I thought.  I’ve already set up more appointments for next week and I’ve decided what part of my skills I want to improve next.”

Action changes us without our consciously being aware of the change while it’s occurring.  We notice the change afterward, and it leads us forward.  Sometimes it’s so hard to act that it feels like pushing one foot in front of the other through a thick swamp.  Eventually, we reach firm ground. It might not happen right away, but it becomes easier to see our goal.  

This week I realized again that I cannot leap tall building in a single bound.  No matter how many times I’ve crashed into buildings in the past, the balance between striving to leap and accepting limitations can be difficult to discern.  Knowing I would crash into the building if I tried to leap it, I stayed on the ground and figured out alternative paths to my goals.  I kept telling myself, “Act your way into being, Barbara,” and I made myself act each day to counter the inertia I felt.  I knew that I couldn’t think my way out of this, but that if I were nice to myself, stayed engaged with the world, prayed, and kept moving forward—even with small steps—I’d make progress towards the new life I want on the other side of that blasted building.  As I look back, even this tough week brought good about which I’m pleased.  I grew through the struggle, learned some things about myself, discovered to new questions to ponder, and found doors that hold promise and affirmation.  If I’d given in and not acted my way into being, I’d be looking at the past week with regret.  Instead, I feel good about the person I am now, after this week of being changed by acting.  So, who do you want to be, in yourself and in the world?  What do you want to change?  What does God want for you?  Don’t just think.  Do.

 Learning:  We don’t think our way into being.  We act our way into being.